The 59th Annual Hunger Games: In it to Win it
by NomadDreamer
Summary: Slight AU: Johanna will not have been the only female victor from District 7, and obviously she hasn't won yet! Ashe Fielding finds himself fighting for life in the Annual Hunger Games- No surprise there. However, it's not his own life that he's fighting for. My First Hunger Games fic, kindness appreciated! ;) Please R&R, it would make my day! Updates: Sporadic- exams! :(
1. Chapter 1

The sound of raindrops on the roof wakes me. I rub my eyes brearily wondering what time it is. It's then I remember what day today is, The Reaping day. Without realising it I have started to get up out of bed. Rose. Today is her first reaping. I look towards the bed beside me which is where she and my two other sisters Willow and Amber sleep. She isn't there. Obviously. Clearly she couldnt sleep. I remember the night before my first reaping, in fact the night before all the reapings, I've been plagued with nightmares of past Hunger Games.

I look back at my brother Scott still sleeping soundly beside me. Today for him, if his name isn't chosen, will be a day of relief, for today, at the age of eighteen, is his last reaping. unlike my sister Rose for whom the nightmare is just beginning. For the next six years her name will be in the reaping ball and every year the odds will be more and more against her because every year her name will be entered an extra time. And thats not including tesserae which, hopefully, she will never have to sign up for. Amber isn't signed up for it but Scott and I are because back a few years ago our family were going through a tough time and that meagre supply of grain and oil each month was all that kept us from starvation.

Unfortunately though, all the entries are cumulative, and so even though I had I only had to sign up for it one year all my six entries will still be in the reaping ball which means that at 17 my name will be in there 12 times. May the odds be ever in my favour as our district escort would say.

With her dark skin, covered in golden tatoos and a messy tangle of red locks which has obviously been styled to look exactly this way, Juniper Talinn is somewhat loathed here in District 7, for it is her who choses the girl and boy who are sent into the arena. Not that she specifically picks an individual, she just picks the names out of the reaping ball. Still, I can't help but despise her. A few years ago the name she picked was that of my best friend Harper Pine. His 13 year old body was sent back to District 7 in a simple wooden box, his face covered in gaudy scars and bruises.

That's what happens to 23 people in 12 different districts every year for the rules of the games are simple. Kill or be killed. 24 enter the arena but only one person emerges, the Victor. District 7 has had 4 victors in the past 58 years, 3 of whom are still alive. Our first victor Yves Citric drank himself to death after turning to drink to keep away the nightmares of his games and the dead tributes he had mentored. Besides the victor's district being showered in gifts of food the year they won and the victor themselves getting enough money to live a couple of lifetimes on, they also get the honour of mentoring the future tributes from their district. Honour. Indeed.

Stretching I get out of bed. Our house is a small 3 roomed log cabin, uniform in district seven but varying depending on family size.  
It's later than usual when I get up. The Day of the Reaping in the Capitol's eyes is a day of festivity- A national holiday. Maybe for them. They don't live in fear that their name will be chosen, they don't have to feel the guilt as you pray a silent thank you that it wasn't their loved one chosen. Because it's a holiday nobody has to work or go to school, and so you try to sleep in, if you can.

The Reaping is scheduled to take place at noon in the square in front of the Justice building, one of the Districts finer features. There isn't much of a town here in seven. Just the Justice Building, the school, a few carpentry shops and then there's the butchers, bakers etc. -and the merchants stores. Full of luxurious items which most of us could never afford. I used to be brought in by my mother occasionally. She loved to browse through them, fantasising about what she'd buy if she could afford it. I haven't gone in there since she died. It was 10 years ago now, when Willow was born.

My father is leaning over the sink when I reach the kitchen, presumably cleaning the dishes. "Morning Pop", I greet him as I stretch and reach for a piece of bread. Then I hear him sniffle and realise he wasn't washing up, he was crying. I awkwardly lean over to pat him on the back and he looks up at me and attempts a weak smile. "I'm sorry Ashe. I didn't mean for you to see me like this." "Pop it's fine, you're worried, it's totally normal. Everybody is. It's the worst day of the year we all know that. But listen, it's gonna be fine! There are hundreds of names in both balls, the odds really are in our favour." Even if I don't believe it I have to reassure him. It scares me to see him cry like that, a grown man who is seen as tough, strong and reliable.

My Pop is known in the district for his kindness, strength and sense of humour. The only other time I've ever seen him cry is when Mom died and even then he was so strong for all of us as we grieved. "It's just, now I have four of you Ash! Four of you all in danger! And you and Scotty... I should never have allowed you to get the tesserae! And little Rose! She's 12! 12 years old and today she could potentially receive her death warrant! She could be dead in a week! Any of you could be! And i just... I just... If I lose any of you, You, Scott, Amber or Rose I don't think I could go on! I mean I've already lost your mom!" With this he breaks down and all I can do is stand there, patting him on the back and reassuring him despite my own doubts. "Look, first of all Pop, At least you have 5 of us. Remember the Pines when Harper was picked? They've never stopped grieving, nothing has ever gone back to normal and it never will, because as far as they're concerned they have no reason left to live! He was all that they had and now that he's dead they're slowly letting themselves die too! At least you'll have four more of us left to live for, should the unthinkable happen. And secondly, don't beat yourself up about the Tesserae. We needed it and you never asked us to sign up for it ok? We volunteered. Thirdly, Rose's name is in there once, once ok?! The odds of her being picked are so slim that you don't even need to worry about it! Pop, it's gonna be ok! Whatever happens everyone will go through it together, and we can cross that bridge when, no if, it comes to it, no sooner."

"You always were so strong and sensible Ashe! Your mom would be so proud, I know I am. I don't know what I'd do without you! Any of you..." I pat him reassuringly on the back again just as Sott walks in to the room. He quickly brushes his tears away gruffly. Scott doesn't seem to notice. "Ashe, Pop, good morning. Well, at least I hope it will be... He trails off as if remembering what day it is today. "How's Rosie?" he asks with a slight grimace. "She's outside with Amber and Willow... making dasiy chains I think." As if her being 12 years old isn't enough, the fact that she's making daisy chains reminds me of her innocence and how unfair the situation truly is. For all of us. "I'll go see how she is," he says as he saunters out the door. "So Pop, do you need a hand with anything? Any jobs you need me to do around the place?" With the state he's in at the moment I feel I ought to lend a hand in any possible way. "Well if you really want you could help me bring a few bits and pieces of wood to the workshop?" When he says workshop it's really just a fancy name for the shed that he does his carving in out the back. He's in forestry, a woodcutter like the majority of the District 7 population, I even do a few hours myself, but he's always loved carving and making things. Whether it just be another chair or shelf for the kitchen he loves it. He can't afford setting up a shop or anything but occassionally people will buy a few of his creations which makes him really proud. It's usually just friends and he sells them ridiculously cheap, hardly covering the cost of the wood (he's too decent to just take some despite it's abundance in the district) but he's actually really good. he's made a few dolls and figurines for us too.  
The workshop is its usual over full self so I manoeuvre through carefully with the logs. "So what are you working on at the moment then?" I ask as I set down the logs on the workbench. "Ahh now I can't tell it's a secret! I'll show you when it's finished, but until then it's a surprise." I shrug. Whatever, he's a bit of a perfectionist in the workshop. It stops there though.

My aunts are always giving out about the state of the house. It's really not that bad though. I mean whats a bit of sawdust and mud on the floor? Even if we do clean it everyday it just gets dirty again the next day. Scott's finished school now so he and Pop both work full days leaving me to look after my sisters for a few hours after school. I can't really complain though because aside from the occasional fighting and tussles with each other they behave themselves well. It's the cooking that really bothers me. Pop does 2 days, Scott one, and myself and Amber argue over the other four. Not that there's much to be cooked really. Meat is a treat, usually only when one of us traps or hunts something. You're not supposed to hunt in the woods really per say, but once or twice a month, when Scott and he have coinciding days off work, and one of my aunts can look after the girls, Pop takes Scott and I hunting. It's not that he wouldn't bring the girls, on a few occasions he has, but when Rose saw us kill a rabbit once she refused to eat it and wouldn't speak to us for 3 days. Willow actually enjoyed it but she's too young Pop says and anyway, we don't have any weapons small enough for her. He's working on a bow for her at the moment I think. Amber doesn't really mind either way but when given the choice she usually goes to Aunt Ivy's to play with Bran and Saffron. The few times she's come she's actually enjoyed it and she's pretty good too, not a bad aim. I don't mean to brag but I'm actually pretty good myself. My snares are well crafted and my aim is usually on spot. Scott would be good too except often his sheer size makes it difficult to creep up on creatures. He usually makes too much noise. Scott, like Pop, is broader and taller than me. I'm more like Mom. I have her slight build but I'm still average enough height wise. I also have her bright green eyes and sallow complexion. I have Pop's coal black hair though.

Leaving the workshop I head over to my sisters. Sneaking up behind them I grab Rosie and fling her up into the air. She squeals in first shock and then delight as I catch her and swing her around. Then Willow protests that she wants a go so I do the same to her. Amber rolls her eyes superiorly but i know she just thinks she's too mature to ask so I do the same to her, much to her objections. She smiles brightly when I set her down. "Where's Scott then?" I ask. "Gone to see Daisy before the reaping!" Willow smirks. "He's probably gone to kiss her good luck," Rose says knowingly. I laugh at my sisters apparent knowledge. "So Rosie, how are you feeling? You know you've nothing to worry about right? You either Amber. I mean, what are the odds?" "I'm really nervous," she admits, "honestly I feel like getting sick. I mean, it has to be someone!" "Yes but it won't be you! It'll probably be some 18 year old girl with tesserae or something!" "So someone like Scott?!" Willow wails. Crap! "I promise everything will be fine," I assure them. I feel horrible now because even though I've promised them when it comes down to it there's nothing I can do to help them if they are reaped. They won't be though. I have to keep positive.

With another hour and a half until the reaping I feel totally restless and agitated. I decide to call in on my friend Jasper. He lives just next door and we've been friends for as long as I can remember. Him, Harper and I were always together growing up. It's his sister Scarlett who answers the door. She literally turns scarlet when she sees me. Scarlett is 16, a year younger than Jasper and I. I've grown up with her but then a few months ago we sorta started hanging out alone. I don't know if I'd call her my girlfriend but if Jasper knew about us he'd freak. "Hey!" Leaning past I check to see if anyone is around and seeing nobody else I quickly kiss her.

"Hi Ashe, how're you feeling about today?" she smiles. "Nervous I guess. More so for how my sisters will get on than anything else. I'm in there 12 times too. What about you? Are you in many times?" I ask. "Nine. We had to sign up for tesserae last year." Of course their mom was really sick last year. "It's Rose's first year isn't it? How is she?" "Yeah it is. She's pretty worried. Same as the rest of us were I guess. I remember your first reaping! You were so nervous you threw up that morning! I was here playing with Jasper," I laugh as I recall it. "Shut up! Oh God that's embarrassing," she laughs too. Just then Jasper walks out of the bedroom. "Ashe! How are you? I was a actually about to over to your house. I must wish Rosie a 'Happy Hunger Games' and good luck for her first reaping. How is she?" He says the 'Happy Hunger Games' in our usual mocking impression of the affected Capitol accent. I laugh. "She's pretty nervous as I was just saying to Scarlett. Well I must wish you yourself a Happy Hunger Games too! And may the odds be ever in your favour!" Again I copy the affected accent of Juniper Talinn and co. in the capital.

The three of us discuss our odds in a more serious tone until the doorbell rings revealing Scar's friend Cassidy. "See you later Scar, good luck!" I say after her as Cassidy drags her out the door. She turns her head and smiles, waving goodbye and good luck towards me. She'll be back before the reaping. Most families have a tradition of going together. Just in case they have to make the journey home without a member. We spend about half an hour kicking around a ball in his garden. Then I decide I better go home and get organised. I don't want to be late for the reaping, I reckon it'd be bad luck.

At home I order Amber into the bath first and go and get dressed myself in my blue short sleeved shirt and brown cotton pants. My good clothes in other words. Everyone wears their best to the reaping. These were Scott's about 3 years ago but despite only having an age difference of just a year they're only fitting me now. Scott and I bathed last night so when Amber comes into the room dressed in her pale blue dress that's about 2 inches too short I order Rose to go wash. I get Amber to make sure she does. Obviously Pop, Scott or I wouldn't go in whilst the girls were bathing.

It's half past eleven by the time Rosie is dressed and has had her hair braided by Amber. Willow is in her good clothes too, despite the fact that thankfully she is too young at present to be in the reaping ball. It's all ahead of hr though. "Why are you dressed so fancy?" I tease. "It's not fair that you all get to dress up and I don't!" she retorts causing me to chuckle. "Right so guys. We better get going or we'll be late," Pop says this cheerily enough but I can tell he's been crying again. Frankly it unnerves me to see a grown man crying, particularly my father so I pretend not to notice. I can see that suddenly Rosie has started to shake. "Where's Scott?" I ask. "I haven't seen him since he went to Daisy's!" Amber informs us. "I'm here, I'm here! Sorry I got delayed, I'll tell you later, I'm sorry! Give me two minutes and I'll be ready," he pants as he runs past us into our bedroom. It's three minutes later that we head out the door. We need to allow time to get there because we live right on the outskirts, just beside the dense forest.

When we arrive at the town square my father and Willow are forced to bid us goodbye and good luck as we go and sign in. He promises he'll see us just as soon as the reaping is over and we'll have a nice stew from the leftover rabbit he caught the last day on his way home from work. Willow just hugs us all solemnly. I see her greet her friend a minute later and straight away I hear peals of laughter. "Right. Rosie I know you're nervous but don't you worry, I promise that you won't be chosen. Now I want you to follow Amber, Ashe and I and we'll go get ourselves signed in, then we'll be separated into boys and girls and the different age groups. You'll be up at the top with your friends and the other 12 year olds and Amber will be with the other 13 year olds. Ok?" I now notice that Rosie's shaking has calmed visibly and Amber isn't as pale as a minute ago. Scott always did have a way of reassuring me when I was younger and him telling them this information, despite having already gone through it has managed to calm them slightly. "Rosie, just think of the lovely stew waiting for us when we get home!" I say as I grab her hand and take her towards sign in. Scott takes Amber's hand too.

Once signed in Scott and I hug both girls tightly, wish them good luck and watch as Amber takes Rose's hand and leads her to her section. "Good luck Ashe, you'll be fine hopefully." As he says this Scott envelops me in a bear hug. I hug him back and wish him the best of luck too. Then we go join our peers in the delegated sections, him right at the back. Next year, with a little bit of luck, he'll be back one level further: in the main crowd.

I quickly greet Jasper and some of the others just as the anthem of Panem starts to play. Out onto the stage walk Juniper Talinn, the mayor, and our three living victors. Juniper walks over to a big microphone while the other four seat themselves. What is she wearing? It's some long green yoke and in her hair she wears a green headband made of leaves. She's supposed to be a tree I presume. Obviously she looks ridiculous.  
"Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to the reaping of the 59th annual Hunger Games!" She pauses, as if to wait for a round of applause, but is met with stony silence. "Now I'd like to invite Mayor Everglades to tell you all the history of the games. Mayor Everglades marches over to the microphone and pulling open the scroll in front of her begins to read the history of Panem. Her lack of enthusiasm is clear from her monotone and I begin to respect her. She tells us of the formation of Panem after a series of wars, floods, famines and other disasters, of the division of the districts, then of how the districts rebelled against the Capitol who had so lovingly looked after each district, of the suffering the war caused both sides and finally about the Treaty of Treason. "And so it was decreed that every year each district of Panem would offer up in tribute one young man and woman between the ages of 12 and 18..." I swear I probably know the entire speech off at this stage! Every year it's the same yet every year it makes me sick to think of the monsters that drew up this treaty. "... to fight to the death in the annual Hunger Games."

The mayor wishes us all luck, but not in the patronising way of the Capitol with their 'May the odds be ever in your favour' but in a genuine way. "Good luck to all of you today. Whichever if you two are chosen, just know that all of District 7 will be behind you until the very end." This is greeted by a polite round of applause by everyone and she returns swiftly to her seat with her head bowed. Then Juniper gets back up- no sorry, bounces would be more correct- and beams at the crowd before getting down to the dreaded actual physical reaping. "Now! The moment we've all been waiting for! Aren't you all excited?!" she squeals . I feel like hitting her. There are a few hisses throughout the main crowd. Ignoring them she totters over to the two big balls with the hundreds of paper slips inside. "Ladies first I think!" she says and after much deliberation plucks a carefully folded slip of paper. Not Amber or Rose! Not Amber or Rose! Not Amber or- "Amber Fielding!" My heart feels like its turned to stone. I feel like throwing up and severely winded. The crowd mutter unhappily. It's terrible for anybody to be chosen but everybody particularly hates when the younger ones, the twelve or thirteen year olds, are reaped. Not, surely not Amber Fielding as in my sister?! Not Amber who was making daisy chains this morning? Who'd rather play with get cousins than hunt? Who's afraid to go any further than 100 metres into the woods alone? Who's afraid of the dark? I feel a few boys around me pat me pitifully on the back, mumbling their sorries. "Amber? Where are you sweetheart? Oh! There you are! Won't you come up onto the stage for us?"

I look to where Juniper points and see my sister shakily make her way up to the platform. She's the image of mom in that split second and suddenly I'm reminded of my conversation with my father this morning. He can't lose mom again! She looks so vulnerable. My heart breaks as she makes her way to the platform, tears already streaming down her face. "Now then sweetie, how old are you?" "Th-thirteen!" Amber stutters pale as a ghost. She looks fit to collapse. "Well then is there any volunteers? Anybody? Nobody? Ok then! Everybody, meet District 7's female tribute Amber Fielding!" No volunteers. Well why would there be? Rosie is younger and most people wouldn't volunteer for a sibling, not to mind a random 13 year old girl. Family loyalty only goes so far for most families on reaping day. Not for the Fieldings though. I know what I have to do. "Now! Who will be sharing the honour with Amber of representing District 7 in the 59th annual Hunger Games?! She roots around in the ball and, having successfully hovered around enough to build suspense for the Capitol viewers, she selects a slip. "Congratulations to Har-" "I volunteer! I volunteer as tribute!" I push forward, hearing the gasps and murmurs around me. I hear my name from behind me and catch a brief glance of Scott. I'm almost running to the stage.

When I reach the platfo Juniper Talinn totters over to me a big beam plastered around her stretched face. "Well look at that! How exciting it is to have a volunteer in District 7! What's all your name dear?" She looks positively elated to have the excitement of a volunteer. There's hardly ever any volunteers in any districts except for 1, 2 and 4; the career districts. The districts where the tributes are trained in academies from a young age and where it really is seen as an honour to represent your district. 1 and 2 are the worst. Between the two of them they've won it at least half the times. "I'm Ashe Fielding, Amber's my little sister," I choke. "Ooh how exciting! Wanted to make sure your family had a champion right?" I can tell she doesn't really know what to say so I call her bluff. "No I want to make sure she stays alive." More murmurs from the crowd because now everybody knows who I am. For the first time I look over at Amber. There are tears flowing down her face and when she sees me looking she shakes her head discreetly, as if to say: You shouldn't have. But I know that I had to. Because my sister is not going to die at 13. Not if I can help it. "Oh how... Brave of you Ashe..." I grin in response. Better start playing to the cameras if I want to get sponsors. And also, despite the terrible situation, I'm pretty pleased to have made Juniper squirm. "Well, Congratulations to the Fieldings, Amber and Ashe who will be this years representatives for District 7. Lets hear it for them one last time!" Silence. Then somebody whistles the short three-note melody used to signal home time to the foresters. And then suddenly weary body is whistling and then they are chanting our names and I can't help but feel tears prick at the corner of my eyes: "Vic-tor-y! Vic-tor-y!" comes after our names. I realise then that, whatever the outcome, I shall never see these people again. And that fills me with a sense of dread and grief. However I know the cameras will be watching carefully so I simply smile, raise my hand in a salute, and now towards the crowd before Peacekeepers come onto the stage and surround Amber and I as they lead us through the stage into the Justice building. The building is easily the nicest in 7 and certainly the most well kept.

Despite the fact that we are siblings and therefore share family members we are led to separate rooms where I wait for my friends and family to come and say their goodbyes. Because I know there isn't even the slimmest hope I will return to District 7. I volunteered to keep my sister alive and even if by some miracle we don't get killed by careers or some gamemakers trap I won't be coming home. This morning was the last time I will ever pass through my front door. All of a sudden my knees start to shake. So hard that I have to sit down on one of the fancy couches that are placed around the room for the goodbyes. The fabric is shiny and soft but what it is I have no idea, though I find it's touch oddly comforting. Who will my family visit first, I wonder suddenly. It's me. I suppose it's better like that because I'd hate for Amber to spend her last few minutes of goodbyes without them.

"Ashe! Oh Ashe what were you thinking!" my father chokes as soon as he enters, Scott, Rose and Willow in tow. "He pulls me into his arms and starts to cry. Which nearly sets me off because, aside from this morning and when mom died, I have never seen him cry. As he lets go I'm hugged by the others. "Why... Why did you volunteer?" my father manages. "Because nobody else did," I reply simply. I know it's not a sufficient answer so I try again. "When I saw Amber being called to the stage all I saw was a little girl, looking alone and lost. Pop, she's 13, she's afraid of the dark, she's not... She's couldn't survive without help and who else would form an alliance with her? I had to, that's all. I'm her big brother, protecting her is my job." "Ashe I can't lose you either! And what if-" his voice cracks, "-if I lose the both of you?" "You won't Pop. I promise you that I will take care of her and protect her until I'm dead on the ground." As soon as I say it I realise this probably isn't the smartest thing to say but then Scott starts to laugh. And then me, followed by Rose and finally Dad. Willow looks at us all laughing with hysteria but we quickly stop when she starts to sob. And then my father's chest starts heaving and he starts choking up again. I pull Willow into my lap and stroke her blonde silky hair, knowing it's the last time I ever will. "Sshh Willow, sshh," I soothe. "It's gonna be ok, Amber will be back before you know it and me? Well I'll be with Mom!" She buries her head into chest and I look pleadingly over my head at Scott to take her so I can hug the others. He hoists her out of my arms into his own and continues soothing her just as I have done. "Rosie come here," I beckon. "Now I'm gonna need you to be extra good for the time being, at least until Amber comes home alright?" She nods , her face a rigid mask. "You know, we have a potentially major advantage that you must forget- Amber and I can climb trees like no other district, apart from maybe 11! Besides," I say jokingly in an attempt to cheer her up, "With my charm and good looks what sponsor wouldn't want me?!" She cracks a small grin and elbows me lightly in the chest. Seeing me glance at the clock on the wall she hops off my lap with a final tight squeeze. Scott gestures for Pop to go ahead of him so Dad stands in front of me, arms outstretched and pulls me into a bear hug the minute I stand up. "You know your mom would be so so proud of you, of what a strong, determined young man you've become. I'm so proud of you. But I-I can't- I don't know what to do about this, I can't lose you!" He doesn't cry though, I know he's trying to be strong for me. He pulls away and just then a peacekeeper comes to the door announcing their time was almost up. "No!" Willow starts to wail and grabs on to my shirt once more and so does Rose. Dad gently pulls them off and grabs me into one final hug. They all rise to leave and I'm struck that I have yet to say goodbye to my brother. Just as the thought crosses my mind he pulls me into his giant embrace and whispers, "I'm so sorry I didn't volunteer! I couldn't! I," he gulps, "Daisy is pregnant, I have to be there for her and the baby, our baby..." "Oh my God Scott! Wow, umm... Congratulations!" I'm surprised but my response is genuine. "What's going on?" Pop asks, hearing me. Scott quickly covers up, " Oh I was just wishing him good luck and may the odds be ever in their favour, him and Amber." "Ok well I'm bringing the girls out and I'll be back to give you something." More tearful hugs and goodbyes and they're gone and its just Scott and I once more. "Ashe, I'm so sorry... I should have... But Daisy..." "Don't be, you know I would never have forgiven myself if you had volunteered! Besides, it's my own fault." "I love her Ashe and I can't leave her alone. I wanna marry her, the baby doesn't change any of that." "Well my congratulations to her too. And know that I volunteered cos I wanted to protect Amber, you can't change that. Besides I'm the better hunter!" I say in an attempt to make him smile. It just about works. "That you are!" He gives me a final hug and leaves as Pop arrives in.

"I just wanted to give you this, it's a token, I bring it to all the Reapings for good luck and strength. And I guess maybe just in case something happens God forbid. I made it." He hands me a circular wooden token, hung on a piece of cord, about the size of my palm, with a picture of my mother engraved on the top. "Wow. It's beautiful Pop. Thank you, I..." "Flip it over," he says with a slight smile. On it, in his elegant craftsmanship, my father has carved, in a tiny delicate script, something that my mother always used to say to us: "No matter where you are in this world, or what you have done, I will always be there for you, even if it's only in spirit." It's enough to have me almost in tears. I grip him into a firm hug and then, before I break down tell him it's time to go see Amber. "I love you Ashe. So very much. And that thing, on the token? That goes for both your mother and I."

When he's gone I collapse onto the couch behind me, my face coerced by my hands as I begin to truly consider for the first time what I've done. Everyone thinks I'm crazy, that I know. Because I have just guaranteed that my father will lose at least one child to these games, and realistically, the odds are that he'll lose both of us. But these people judging me? They don't understand. Amber is so fragile that I know she'd be dead in an instant. She's sweet and kind and small, everything that makes her a simple target. When our mother died, Amber was only three, and in many ways found herself already held back by responsibilities. Most guys would probably be embarrassed to admit this, but between us, Amber and I have filled the void our mother left pretty well. We share most if the household chores, as well as care for Rose and Willow when Pop and Scott are working. But Amber needs to be looked after too. And I know that if she has any chance of surviving she'll need my help. She will survive. I have to make sure of it. Otherwise it will be my fault that my father's heart is broken. And I can't allow that to happen again.

The door opening jolts me back to reality, and a small smile lights my face as my aunts come in and hug me, followed by two of my cousins, Bran and Saffron. Their visit is fleeting but full of hugs, and well wishes, and even a few scoldings before Petunia cries and goes back to hugging me. After that I'm surprised to find Scarlett waiting to see me. She hugs me wordlessly, then strokes my jaw and kisses softly. "Why?" she whispers. "She's 13 years old," is all I manage to choke out. "So, is this really goodbye?" she asks. "I'm afraid so," I smile sadly, stroking her hair before pulling away. "Look Scarlett, I'm not coming back. And well, we... I liked you a lot, but we... Nobody knew about us, so don't... Don't hesitate to find another guy tomorrow, some idiot who's actually romantic, you know?" She smiles at me through tear-filled eyes.  
"I better go, I know Jasper is outside. He'll be wondering why I'm here. Can I tell him? Later I mean? Why I was here?" "Umm, sure, why not. I mean he can't kick my ass when I'm in the Capitol. And, you were... Umm... You were, are, important to me..." I trail off... I'm a great big brother, I have a lot of girlfriends, but when it comes to an actual girlfriend- if that's even what she was- I'm hopeless. She shuts me up by kissing me one more time. This kiss feels different. Stronger and more meaningful. Full of longing, but also goodbye. Wow. Typical it would be our last kiss. As she exits she turns with a smile, "And Ashe? You were plenty romantic an idiot for me."

I standing with a sad smile, staring at the door he just closed behind her when her brother walks in. "Hey," I say simply. "Look man, I don't have much time, those peacekeeper dudes warned me I had like a minute, my stupid sister took up so much time." I smile at his abruptness- typical Jasper. "What did she want anyway?" Now or Never. "We umm... She was my... She and I... We've gotten pretty close over the last few months..." I look at him pleadingly, willing him to get there so I don't have to tell him I've been making out with his sister behind his back. "Oh!" His facial expression is priceless, I'd tease him about it, were we not in the current situation. "Ok," he says with a nod, causing a sigh if relief to escape me.  
"Anyway, you needn't worry about it anymore," I say, attempting to bring back conversation. "True," he laughs. Then he becomes serious. "You wouldn't have been so had to put up with anyway... Look man, I get it, why you volunteered. I'm an older brother, I like to think I'd do the same for Scarlett, though honestly, I don't know if I would've been brave enough. But you're my friend. So I'm gonna still wish you hadn't. Wish I wouldn't have to watch you, just like I watched Harper, die and come back in a wooden box. So I'm rooting for you anyway." He places a hand on my shoulder. "Stay safe man. Don't do anything stupid. And take care of Amber. I'll keep an eye on the others, I know Scott will but still." The door opens just then and a peacekeeper enters, informing us that time is up. "I'll miss you Jasper," I say, hugging him tightly. "Me too you Ashe." He turned and just as he was leaving he did a little bow and squealed in a voice so similar to Juniper's I burst out laughing, "May the odds be ever in your favour!"

The station is where the Capitol will get their final footage for the reaping so I make sure to plaster a confident, cheerful smile on my face. This is a game to the Capitol, and to win, I need to play by their rules, which means I need to smile and wave, so as to entice as many sponsors as I can. After all, in the arena, sponsors can be the difference between life and death. Amber doesn't even glance my way but, while I'm worried, I know she'll come around, and I can't let my façade slip, not yet. Because it would be foolish to think the games begin in the arena. The games have already begun.

_**AN: Please excuse any typos and the length! I hope the formatting is ok! I'd be thrilled to get some feedback (just like everyone else on this site!) so please do let me know! I want to know if it would be worthwhile continuing. Thank you!**_


	2. Chapter 2

I can see Amber's jaw dropping at the sight of the train'a luxury. I've never have much of a eye for these things, but even I can tell that it's beautiful. Juniper has been babbling non-stop since we left the Justice Building, but I don't think she's even notice that we haven't listened to a word she says. The 3 living Victors, who were previously seated on the stage, are already lounging around on the plush couches, in what I assume to be the main carriage. They are laughing and joking with one another but grow silent when Juniper imposes all three of us into the middle of the conversation. "Ahem. Alright, allow me to make the introductions. These, victors, are our District 7 tributes for the 59th annual games: Amber and Ashe Fielding." The victors smile kindly at us, particularly at Amber, while I'm aware of them scrutinising me from the corner of their eyes. "And these, Amber and Ashe," gushes Juniper, "As I'm sure you're well aware, are the Victors of District 7: Joshua Sparling, winner of the 25th games, Zachariah Oakley, winner if the 43rd games, and, our most recent victor, Cordelia Harp. Cordelia won just 5 years ago!" Cordelia snorts, "Victor indeed..." she mutters, earning a sharp glance from Zachariah and Joshua. "Amber, Ashe, a pleasure to meet you both. Josh will do just fine." "As will Zach," smiled their second mentor, following Joshua's lead in shaking both their hands. Cordelia stays sprawled on the couch, but casts Amber a kind smile before blatantly staring me up and down. "So," Josh began, realising Cordelia wasn't moving, "Obviously this is a difficult time for the two of, especially given the special circumstances, but we'll be here to help with everything, from tactics in the arena, to the interviews with Ceasar." "Here, here!" Zach interrupted, raising a glass, eating a smirk from Cordelia and a dirty look from Josh. "Why don't we all sit down for dinner and get right to it!" Juniper suggests, her usual chirpiness as irritating as ever. "Good idea!" Josh nods with relief. Having won 34 years ago, he must in his late forties at least. As far as I can recall from my father, he was 17 when he won, which would make him 51. He was one of the tributes elected to participate in the first Quarter Quell. I can only imagine the horror and grief he must have one through. Firstly to have been voted by his own people to be sent to his almost certain death, and then to have faced the best of all the districts- because everyone knows that the results were no surprise. An unofficial vote was held and the girl and boy with the strongest likelihood of winning were elected and trained for the three months leading up to the reaping. At least, that's how it was in 7- and he also had the added nightmare of an enhanced arena. The arenas are always deadly, but twists are always added for the Quells. Zach was 18 when he won, meaning he must be 34 now, while Cordelia is one of the youngest victors even now, at just 20 years old. I remember her games. She won, not by brute strength like most, but by her cunning and speed. She trailed the career pack right up until they turned on each other, pillaging food from their traps and sticking to the trees. She won the final battle by allowing the two remaining careers to fight it out until they were both weak, and then luring her opponent into a trap, stabbing him. She was only 15, and the Capitol loved her for it, although, truth be told, they had missed the usual gruesome showdown. Everybody in District 7 had massive respect for her too, not that she seemed to notice. She was rarely seen out and about, except for occasionally hanging around the black market with a group of friends.

As soon as we were seated three Avoxes arrived out, carrying enormous platters. The food was delicious, there was a deliciously creamy vegetable broth, duck smothered with an orange flavoured sauce, lamb stew with dried plums, and, my favourite, a white fish, covered in spices, accompanied but roasted vegetables I can't even identify as well as tiny Spring potatoes. I notice Amber wearily eying the food so I reach for her plate, heap a bit of everything onto it, and put it down in front of her. "Eat up, it's delicious! And try some of the soup, it's to die for. We need to fatten ourselves up for our time in the arena!" I joke. She gives a small smile before realising she's decided not to talk to me, and slowly picks up her cutlery, cautiously sampling each dish. It's not long before she's digging in, ravenous like myself, having been too nervous to eat much breakfast. I'm aware that our exchange does not go unnoticed, but when I glare up they turn back to their plates hastily, except for Juniper who positively beams (no doubt she's already considering a PR spin), while Cordelia shamelessly meets my glare. "So Josh, weren't you mentioning something about tactics?" she asks suddenly, before shovelling more of the delicious meal into her mouth. "Ah yes! Tactics. So... Well I'm aware the situation is a little different this year, what with you being siblings and the circumstances of Ashe's volunteering..." "I want you to treat us as entirely separate. Ashe had no right, NO right, to volunteer with me!" she shouts the last part, staring at me, eyes filled with tears. The other four just look between us awkwardly, unsure of what to do, though I notice a slight smirk on Zach's face. I'm really bit sure whether or not I trust this guy. He has a bit of a reputation back home. "Excuse me," Amber mutters, leaving the table and rushing down towards the back if the train, where I assume the rooms are. "Your room and ensuite is the third door down on the left," Juniper hollers after her, to which she receives a grateful back glance from Amber. I'm mortified by the whole exchange. I have to talk to her. "Pardon me, and thank you for the wonderful meal." As I rush down after Amber I hear Cordelia mutter to Josh, "This should be an interesting pair."

I knock gently on Amber's door before allowing myself in. The room is spacious, and as luxurious as the rest if the train. In the middle of the room is an enormous bed, and on too of it, lies Amber. "Go away." "Amber, I know you're mad, but just hear me out, ok?" When I get no response I continue. "When your name got called, I felt like I'd fallen of that oak tree behind our house when I was 12. I couldn't breathe. Amber, you're 13 years old, you deserve to live!" "But-" she interrupts. "Listen to me," I plead. "I'm your older brother and you have to trust me. Willow and Rose, they need you. You're like a mother to them, and they can't lose Mom all over again. And you should have seen Pop this morning, if anything happened to you, he'd die." "The same goes if anything happens to you. Rose and Willow need you too!" she protests. "Amber! Listen. With two of us that means there's one less opponent to worry about. And I swear to you, I'll protect you until I'm dead on the ground. You're gonna get home! Imagine Pop's face when he sees you wear the crown, the girls' when you have enough money to buy them new dresses and candy. I don't doubt your abilities for a second, but you're 13, and you're up against trained killers. I'm good with a bow and arrow, and I've been swinging axes since forever. I know it will be awful for Pop to lose one of us, but at least he'll be able to stop worrying about cash, maybe even open his workshop. Can't you at least try to understand?" I beg. "I understand why you're doing it Ashe, and it's so brave but," she sighs, "I really wish you hadn't." "Well I have. So now just accept it and work with me. Imagine Willow and Rose when they see you all dressed up for your interviews!" She grins in spite of herself, and I know that for now, the best I can hope for is acquiescence. "Come on," I say, reaching out a hand, "let's go see if there are any deserts!"

The victors and Juniper all look surprised to see us back so soon, and it's clear from the way yet stop talking that we were the topic of conversation. However the rest of the meal passes successfully, just idle chat about out family and ourselves. Then Juniper announces it's time to go watch the other Reapings, so we all make our way towards the lounge area. I can feel myself tense up when I see Caesar Flickerman and Claudius Templesmith's grinning faces light up the screen. "Welcome, welcome, welcome! This is it folks, time to meet the brave tributes of the 59th annual Hunger Games!" Caesar is positively bouncing up and down. "And what an exciting beginning we've had ladies and gentlemen! Not 1, not 2, not 3 or even 4, but FIVE volunteers!" Claudius continues. "So without further ado, let's have a look at one and two!" Caesar announces, before chortling at his rhyme. Thankfully they only should the introductory video once so we only have to listen the the mayors' speeches before seeing the tributes. When the boy from District 1 is chosen, I'm surprised to hear nobody volunteer. That is until I see him. Julius I his name and it's clear he has been training since he was born. His muscles ripples through his shirt as he waves and guffaws at the crowd, before beginning his own chant "Vic-tor! Vic-tor!" which the citizens of 1 are only too delighted to repeat. The girl is chosen and replaced by a volunteer, a girl almost as muscular as Julius. The tributes from 2 are equally enthusiastic, both having volunteered. The girl, Victoria stays in my mind. She's hit but she has a glint in her eye that warns she means business. Her district partner Flint is large enough to rival Julius. I can only remember a handful if other tributes. The district 4 volunteer Sandy, who again is a giant- I really wonder what these career guys eat and where they find the money, a girl from 9 who has a lazy eye, and a 12 year old from 12, who looks even younger than 10 year old Willow. When they had reached our reaping, Claudius and Caesar had gotten very excited at the prospect of an outer volunteer, particularly under the 'noble' circumstances. When the broadcast finishes, Willow decides to go to bed. I offer to go tuck her in or whatever but she declines. Juniper also decides to hit the sack. Finding it awkward being alone with the victors and decide to just get a glass of water and retire myself. However when I turn to say goodnight Zach and Cordelia are making their way down the corridor together, with muffled whispers and laughs. Oh. I never saw that coming, I'll be honest. Josh smiles at me and beckons me to sit. "So, you've had quite a day I can imagine," he says kindly. I let out a short laugh. "That's one way of putting it." He laughs too. "I have to ask, why? Why did you volunteer?" I groan in frustration. Nobody seems to understand. "I did it to protect her. I honestly believe I can help her come home. Or at least I'll try." He nods. "So I take it then, you want want all out resources focused on Amber?" "That's right. But I'll be with her until the end anyway so I canals sure of that. You have to promise to try and save her." "Alright. But what about you? What if, let's just say, she somehow dies and you live. What then? What do you do then?" "I'm not going to let that happen." "But-" "No buts," I interrupt. He nods again. "Well we'll talk tactics in the morning I guess, and we should arrive in the Capitol at about noon. Oh and because there's three of us mentoring, Cordelia as Zach will both take one if you as individuals, while I'll oversee the both if you. "Ok," I nod. "But remember, my mentor needs to save Amber too." "Noted. Now I suggest we both try to get some sleep. This time next week, sleep won't be easy to come by for you." I smile. "Goodnight then. And thanks." "Goodnight Ashe. Sweet Dreams."

**_AN:_****_So I won't be updating like this usually I just needed to get this chapter out. I'm not even sure whether or not to continue with this story, the place is already overflowing! I'll stick with it for now anyway! Thank you so much to Aspen Blue for the favourite, I hope this chapter isn't a disappointment! I apologis in advance for typos which I have yet to spot, I will get around to dealing with them. Thank you for reading! :) Review PLEASE!_**


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